Why I hate you all today…kinda…not really…

nothingpersonally

Most of the time I am a positively lovely person. I see the bright side to EVERYTHING (sometimes to the point of annoying those who would rather not hear about it). Most days I LOVE the entire fucking planet and alllll the people on it.

And then some days…

I hate everyone. For NO reason. I start taking EVERYTHING personally. I go out in public and EVERY SINGLE PERSON is purposely getting in MY way.

I am convinced of it. Its like they planned it.

When it happens for like the 6th time in the same store and I find myself in a stand off…STARING someone down…DARING them not to move…it dawns on me…SHIT! Its probably me.

And then I feel guilty for hating everyone and I am mad at myself and still mad at them for being SO annoying in the first place. For like breathing. And the conflict between my normally bubbly little ray of sunshine self and the darkness which has come to visit (uninvited) is a battle that feels like someone took every emotion known to man and let them go like a pin balls to ping around inside of me, out of control.

I have gotten REALLY good at managing my feelings. SO good that when I have a day like this…it feels almost harder somehow than when this is where I use to LIVE. I know that is not true of course. And so…in an attempt to not hate all of you, because I LOVE ALLLLL of you…I examine the why.

I know at least part of the answer (the part I can control) lies in the way in which I treat myself. It happens this way almost every time. Little by little certain things that undermine my well being sneak back in, seemingly harmless until…BAM! I am an unruly toddler. Coffee. Wine. Sugar. Gluten. FUCKERS!

Time to cut out the coffee. AGAIN. Time to limit the wine. AGAIN. Time to reduce the sugar. And for today…time to put my cranky little self down for a nap and maybe a time out until I love you all again ;)

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Anxiety| The Unwanted Visitor

AmeliaMAMAThe following post was written by my daughter, Amelia, who is 16. I asked her to write a post about her struggle with anxiety. I thought her story might help another teen or a parent who has a child struggling.

 

While I sat in the room I glanced around at my surroundings. It wasn’t a very big office and I had known this from previous times taking my brother to and fro continuously throughout his entire life. It had padded dusty chairs with plastic legs and a small rack of magazines displaying “The everyday life of Kim Kardashian” and other useless banter. It didn’t seem like a sanctuary for my “type”. All these years, and I had never thought I’d be sitting in these chairs without my brother. Never had I been in…That office.

I felt this way from as far back as I could remember. My father would drop me off at school in the morning and the entire ride there we’d be singing and laughing. But as soon as it came time to go through those doors I felt it. My throat clenched up real tight and I couldn’t breathe, my stomach in terrible pain and for no apparent reason I would have a drastic change in emotion from serene to distraught. All my thoughts were now bad things. Everything was now terrifying. I would hear my dads voice “Amelia, you have to go to school today” and I knew that. Shaking me by the shoulder of my unresponsive body. I was there, but I didn’t want to be. I wanted to be happy again, I wanted to be able to breathe again, I wanted to be “okay”.

From that point until I reached my sophomore year of High school my anxiety would come and go, into and out of my body like an unwanted visitor that I could not force out of my home. There would be bad days and good days. Sometimes it would go away for months at a time. Yet it would always come back, head-strong…forcing itself into the narrow corners of my mind.

I’d have these episodes. I’d get myself all worked up. Throat clenched, stomach in knots, pacing across the room. During the spring of 2013 they had become far more regular, frequent. During school, at home. Everywhere I would go I couldn’t help the feeling of being trapped. Alone without the help I would need from someone who understood. That tended to be the problem, no one understood.

My sophomore year of high school, 2012-2013 was easily the worst year of my entire life. Many unfortunate events kept occurring and causing me more and more feeling of being alone and worried. My grades were not what I had wanted them to be, my great grandfather passed away, my cat had to be put down. All of these things factored into the way I was feeling all the time. They never left my mind. The unwanted visitor was now a permanent resident in the property of my mind. For several months I kept it to myself because I thought that, similar to in the past, it would go as fast as it had come. When I realized that it was there to stay I reached out to my parents for help.

The office was small and familiar, yet the room that my brother had always left us for was a world that I had never expected to be in. I had never imagined that all of my problems could be solved by the changes that I had made in one day. Although I was put on medicine, I learned a lot through everything.

I leaned that life is like a roller coaster. You go through ups and downs no matter what. It’s up to you whether you scream or enjoy the ride. My anxiety reminds me of this. Although I may feel stressed out or worried, it is up to me on how I deal with the situation.

So…to any readers, worried parents of children with anxiety, teens suffering the everyday life of high school and the stress you feel, or even if you’re an adult and you yourself are feeling anxious;  life is filled with ups and downs. You have to start somewhere in the middle, but without the downs we may never feel up. I hope you realize that it will get better. I hope that you know that life all depends on how you deal with your stressors. I just want you to know that no matter how old or young you are, you’re not alone.

Sincerely ~ Amelia Mary Fato.

 

 

ProfileISH-150x150Hope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

 

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P90X3 is coming! FAQ and info on my January Test Group

I have some EXCITING news!!

P90X 3 is coming out on December 10th, 2013.  It’s gonna be amazing!!!

The folks who were in the test group got incredible results (see video above)!!

I’m very excited to announce that I will be forming my own TEST GROUP starting Monday, January 6th. Beachbody can guarantee a Christmas delivery if you order by the 15th of the month. So don’t delay!

In order to be in my test group, you must place your order by clicking here.

The opportunity to be in my January Test Group is open to folks who order through me and to my existing customers. It is not  available to folks who are already working with another Beachbody coach. You can message me at HopeMFato@facebook.com should you have any questions about the test group.

*Note: the best value is the Challenge Pack, which includes P90X3 and a monthly supply of Shakeology. The price will go up to from $180 to $205 in December. Bought separately, you would pay $240.

Have P90X3 related questions? Below is the official FAQ released by Team Beachbody.

FAQ:

When is P90X3 available for purchase?
P90X3 will be available to order by end of day 12/10. If you order from me, Hope Fato at www.beachbodycoach.com/HippieChick , I will become your free coach. :)

Where is P90X3 available for purchase?
Find it in the TBB Store and take advantage of free shipping until 12/31. The tool kit will also be available by end of day 12/10.

www.beachbodycoach.com/HippieChick

When should I order it to guarantee I get it by Christmas?

Order by 12/15 11:59 PM to guarantee delivery by 12/25.

What special offer is associated with the release of P90X3?
All orders of P90X3, purchased on TeamBeachbody.com, through a Coach or through a Challenge Pack, from 12/10/13 through 12/31/13 will include a free P90X3 hat. There are no hats for P90X or P90X2 orders at this time.

Is there an App available?
The P90X App will be available for Android on 12/10 and the Android version will include the ability to track P90X3 workouts. The functionality to track your P90X3 workouts will be available soon for the iPhone App.

Is there a vegan meal plan option available for P90X3?
There will be vegan options included in the new P90X3 Nutrition Guide that will be available on December 10, 2013.

For tips and ideas on how to modify the P90X3 meal plan to be more vegan friendly, we encourage customers to post the topic on the Team Beachbody message boards (http://www.teambeachbody.com/connect/message-boards/-/message_boards/category/19535469). We have dietary experts that monitor the posts and provide some great ideas and direction.

How long does it take to complete P90X3?
P90X3 is a 90 day program, split into 3 Blocks. Blocks 1 & 2 each consist of 4 weeks, while Block 3 lasts 5 weeks.

Additionally, the Elite Block calendar, which is an optional block to be completed AFTER the initial 90 days, lasts 4 weeks.

The Elite Block includes 3 workouts not included within the P90X3 Base Kit. These workouts and calendar can be found within the P90X3 Deluxe and Ultimate Kits. In addition, they can also be purchased separately.

How long are the workouts for P90X3?
All P90X3 workouts are 30 minutes. The lone exception is the X3 Ab Ripper workout (15 minutes), included within the Deluxe Kit. Most workouts include a 2-3 minute cool down period.

What is included in P90X3?

BEST VALUE – P90X3 Challenge Pack
Retail Price: $205 (December Promotional Price: $180)

  • P90X3 Base Kit
  • 30-Day Supply of Shakeology HD
  • 30-Day VIP Team Beachbody Club Membership

P90X3 Base Kit Includes:

  • 16 unique and brand new workouts on 8 DVDs
  • Plus, 5 Free Gifts
  • Fitness Guide
  • Nutrition Guide
  • 90 Day Workout Calendar
  • How to Accelerate Intro DVD
  • 24/7 Online Support
  • Network Exclusive P90X One on One: On One Leg DVD
  • Network Exclusive Premium P90X3 Hat ($24.95 value) – December Only!

Base Kit Pricing

  • Retail           $119.85 + S&H
  • Club             $107.87
  • Coach          $89.89

P90X3 Deluxe Kit
Includes everything in the Base Kit PLUS:

  • 3 Elite Extreme workouts on 1 DVD
  • Includes free Elite Block Calendar
  • 1-Month E&E Tub
  • 3 B-Lines Resistance Bands

Deluxe Kit Pricing

  • Retail           $239.70 + S&H
  • Club             $215.73
  • Coach          $179.78 (180 PV)

P90X3 Ultimate Kit
Includes everything in the Base & Deluxe Kits PLUS:

  • 1-Month R&R Tub
  • Gym-Quality P90X® Chin-Up Bar
  • P90X® Chin-Up Max
  • Premium Beachbody Jump Mat

Ultimate Kit Pricing

  • Retail           $329.55 + S&H
  • Club             $296.60
  • Coach          $247.16 (247 PV)

 

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Free Kindle Book | Be A People Person by John C. Maxwell!

Free Kindle Book | Be A People Person by John C. Maxwell!

Free Kindle Book

GRAB THIS FREE KINDLE DOWNLOAD NOW!

Looking for a Free Kindle Book? Who doesn’t LOVE free!! Be sure to check out this one by John C. Maxwell, one of my favorite authors/speakers!

Grab the Free Kindle Book, Be A People Person: Effective Leadership Through Effective Relationships, right now at Amazon! Grab this book if you are looking to grow in your interpersonal relationships! This book can help you understand and help difficult people, as well as improve the relationships in every area of your life.

Don’t forget you don’t actually have to have a Kindle to download these books. You can get the Kindle Download for your iPhone, Blackberry, iPad, PC Computer or Mac Computer! It’s Free software and a great way to take advantage of these Free Kindle Books!

Pricing subject to Change at any time. Please make sure you check the current price onAmazon.com before purchasing.

 

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What you allow is what will continue

Ok, this is gonna be a little quick and dirty.  Been waiting til I have “the time” to sit down and write this…screw it, let’s just do it…

allow continue

Had a realization sometime within the last few weeks and it was one of those moments where you go “DUH! Why didn’t I ever think of it this way before?!”  So this may or may not be earth shattering for you…

“What you allow is what will continue”

I reference it often.

However, I’ve always meant it like…if you don’t like the way someone is treating you, or you are doing something that you would rather not do, or if you have a habit that doesn’t serve you well…well,

“What you allow is what will continue”

 

I didn’t mean it in a negative way but as motivation to make a change, or to stand up for yourself. And then…

I was thinking to myself one day about how loved I have been feeling and that voice, the one deep down inside of me, the one who is wise and whispers truths said

“What you allow is what will continue”

O! M! G!

WHAT a concept!! I am getting goosebumps as I am typing this.

It applies not only to what we do NOT want more of, but to what we desire. How often is it that we want love or support or friendship or whatever and WE are the ones standing in the way. We throw up walls, we protect ourselves, we MISS OUT!

“What you allow is what will continue”

 

ProfileISH-150x150Hope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

 

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Whats for dinner?

 

 

 

“Hey, Mom…what’s for dinner?”

Screen Shot 2013-08-07 at 9.18.57 PM

 

Anyone else ever get tired of hearing this question?  Me too!

And I found a solution to the problem. I stopped cooking every night.

No, this doesn’t mean we grab fast food or order pizza (though we have gone through those phases too). It means, I decided I would not be solely responsible for our families evening meal.

My family dynamics may look a little different than yours. Currently a single Mama to 3 teenagers, I understand this may *seem* a little easier for me than most BUT…unless you are the only parent of an infant or toddler…you have options, sister!

If you have a significant other, work out a schedule. Even if their only responsible for dinner one evening a week, that gives you a break.

Solo parenting? Or want more than one night off?

ENLIST the kids! It was when there was another adult in the house and my kids were all younger that I incorporated – Kid Cook Night. On this night one or all of the kids cooked. They got to pick the meal and I supervised. It was a wonderful opportunity to spend time together and to teach, it also served as a great growth opportunity for a controlling mom to breathe and let go little.

Think your kids are too young? You might be surprised. Even very little ones can help with things like stirring.  You might have to eat P, B & J for dinner but you get a break and they feel accomplished. All of my kids started cooking early and are quite capable in the kitchen now.

My other favorite night…and one that comes a few nights a week at my house…Every Man for Himself Night. It means what it says.

I stock the house with food and we all eat. Some nights I am in the mood to make a meal and when I do its appreciated. Some nights I am not in the mood and I promise no one goes hungry.

I let go of this responsibility AND the guilt associated with not cooking and the following happened:

  • My kids enjoy cooking for me
  • they cook for each other
  • I feel confident they will all be able to cook for themselves when they leave the nest
  • THEY feel confident about their abilities
  • they create recipes

 

I release myself and any other Mom out there from *HAVING* to cook dinner. If thats your gig, and you dig it…COOK ON!  If not, you are no less of a mother…there are so many other ways to love your kids, I promise!

Do you cook every night? Do you want to?  I’d love to hear what happens at your house. Comment below or hop on over to my FB page and tell me!

 

 

ProfileISH-150x150Hope Fato is a Life Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

 

Posted in Balance, Kids, Moms, Parenting, Peace, Tips | 2 Comments

It’s Don’t Feel Bad Tuesday

Tuesday Invite

 

Last week my sister was visiting and we were talking about some kinda BS, like sisters do and I heard my sister say for like the umpteenth time “I feel bad but BLAH BLAH BLAH” or “I feel so bad about BLAH BLAH BLAH but…”

and I asked “Do you know HOW many times you’ve said you feel bad about something?”

and then we had a REAL conversation about how often we both use that term and my sister admitted to saying it a lot when she doesn’t even really MEAN it!

We came to the conclusion that its a nasty little habit that we might like to break up with. However, when you’ve been in bed with something for a long time…sometimes its hard to get out.

I came up with an idea that didn’t seem so overwhelming and that we did NOT feel bad about…we would pick ONE day a week…Tuesday, and we would not feel bad about anything PERIOD. Even if we really fucked up, we would just forgive ourselves, apologize if necessary and MOVE on. Whew! WHAT a concept.

We agreed that if it catches on and we enjoy not feeling so bad about everything, we may explore adding extra days…like all the ones ending in Y.

Then something happened the next day, Tuesday as luck would have it. My sister yelled down asking if I had any clean towels. I did not. I had a house full of guests and NOT ONE clean towel. I yelled back up “NO.”  I’m not really sure whether she got a pool towel from her vehicle (probably), used one already hanging in the bathroom belonging to someone else (I doubt it) or ran around nekkid until she dried off…but I do know, no one died.

AND since it was Tuesday I didn’t even feel bad about it.

 

Do you catch yourself saying this a lot? Do you feel bad about shit you didn’t do on purpose or thats not even in your control? Would you like to participate in Don’t Feel Bad Tuesdays and see if it catches on?

 

ProfileISH-150x150Hope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

 

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or thats what I always thought.

Meditating used to be on my list of things that I wish I could do but couldn’t. WRONG.

There are some things still on that list but now, its the things I haven’t conquered yet list. Also on that list used to be running, journaling and pull ups (I’m sure there are others I am forgetting).  Once upon a time, I truly believed I could NOT do these things, and now I CAN!

What changed?

Mostly my perspective. Something I realized about myself is that I make up rules for how a thing is supposed to be done “right.” If I didn’t think I could do it right, that means I was unable to do it. What I have learned is that sucking at something is the first step toward being kinda good at something (thanks, Jake)

Jake the dog

 

I used to believe if I could not sit still in perfect silence, in a perfect lotus pose and clear my mind COMPLETELY then I was a failure at meditation. Once I found guided meditation, I realized there was more than one “right” way to do it. I relaxed and began to play around with it. Now sometimes I meditate to music and I GROOVE and move in my pose and relax with a light heart and I ENJOY it. I seriously SMILE from the inside out.

This has led to me being able to sit still and silence my mind in meditation at other times with a lot less effort. Letting GO led to what I was looking for…imagine that!

Do you have something you believe you can’t do because you are are unwilling to suck at it first?

 

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

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TODAY marks 6 months until I turn 40!!

this is 40

I posted the other evening on my FB page  that I’d made a decision and that I’d be blogging about it…so…here goes!! I am EXCITED to share!!

I intend on celebrating my countdown to 40 from now until Christmas Eve (my birthday!)!!! 6 months of celebration!

I recently came to the realization that I am SUPER-CRAZY-FREAKIN-EXCITED to turn 40!! I’ve never had a birthday that I shied away from, nor worried about…I have never been so excited about one either!

WHY.

I believe its because I feel like I know myself better today – at this moment – than I EVER have. I know myself with a love and acceptance that I can’t really express in words. The older I get the more ME I feel. It’s like finally understanding something.

GLENDA

I looked outside of myself for much of my life for many different things…love, happiness & approval to name a few. Over the last few years, and at a much deeper level lately, I realized I need only look within. Everything I need, everything I sought is inside of me. Not to minimize how wonderful it is to share these things with others, but when you depend on others to provide them…its a bumpy ride for everyone.

SO, I invite you to be a part of this journey to 40. Help me celebrate and I invite you to celebrate YOURSELF along the way!

 

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

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Would you? Could you?

Boudoir Shoot

I have had the conversation with so many different women about whether or not they would feel comfortable with a risqué photo shoot. Everyones opinion of what constitutes risqué is different of course, and while a lingerie or boudoir shoot is not a big deal to me…I understand that there are some people who would be completely against it.

Then there are the rest of the women I know, who fall somewhere in the middle. They would like to do it, but are intimidated by the idea.

I’ve shared some of my Pin Up stuff with you guys before and explained how I got into it (here). Quite honestly, other than the calendar stuff I don’t really do much other modeling anymore…but last night I had the opportunity to do some other stuff. I was helping a friend get some boudoir type pic’s for an upcoming website revamp and I forgot HOW MUCH FUN it is!

(ps - the above pic was just snapped w/ my phone and not one of the final/shoot pic's)
 

I’d like to encourage any of you who has ever considered a photo shoot..DO IT!  Find a photographer whose work you love, check some references and then ENJOY the experience. I highly recommend using someone who provides hair and make up as part of the package, it REALLY makes a huge difference.

Your pic’s can be as edgy or as innocent as YOU feel comfortable with. Jeans & a t shirt or just a mens shirt and some heels…either will be sexy if you FEEL sexy. It’s a very powerful experience and something that I think every girl should do for HERSELF. You may elect to give the pictures to your guy as a gift but, the real gift will be giving yourself the experience.

Curious how many of you have had pictures done? How many want to?

 

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

 

 

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Here I sit…wanting to blog…not sure what I want to say.

I’m gonna just kinda GO with it, free flowing, summer breeze, not wearin’ panties kinda…loosey goosey and we’ll just see where we end up! Deal?

I’ve had SUCH an interesting week.

I spent some wonderful time, raising money for a good cause with some very treasured friends. I have been support for some of those dear to me who are going through some stuff. I’ve celebrated with my kids as we end the school year. I had the opportunity to connect and find some closure with someone important to my past.

I’ve been doing a LOT of reflection and while there are a LOT of things I don’t have answers to, and I’ve even found (created?) some new questions…I feel centered. In THIS moment, I claim it. It doesn’t happen often and it may not stay for long but DAMN IT! there it is. In the midst of a bunch of *stuff*…in a place where I would not imagine this feeling as a result…there it is.

Maybe because I my cup got all filled up with the things that matter -

  • PEOPLE
  • LOVE
  • LAUGHTER
  • EMPATHY   (jesus, sweeeeet baby jesus, is empathy EVER not on my list?)

 

What I notice did not make the list…

  • chores
  • planning
  • stress
  • overanalyzing (though its been trying HARD to sneak up on me)

yellowsundress

This week, I’ve been honoring my inner voice a lot more than usual. I’ve been sitting with myself so to speak and I am enjoying the company. I feel relaxed. Maybe its summer, maybe its sundresses, maybe if I can figure it out…I can do…be? more of it!

 

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

 

 

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Classic Pinup Calendar

 

Classic-PinUp.com 2014 Charity Calendar

Today I am off  to WWII Weekend at the Mid Atlantic Air Museum, in Reading, PA I have attended this event for the last 5 years or so and its a lot of fun. If you are anywhere nearby I invite you to stop by and grab a calendar! Proceeds go to Guitars for Vets, and amazing organization providing music therapy to injured vets. If you can’t make it, please click Classic-Pinup.com above and purchase on online.

My favorite part of the event others than hanging out with some of my FAVORITE fabulous ladies…

1940's Pin Up Baseball

…is hanging out with and getting to know WWII Vets. Jewels Desgain WWII Veteran

I’ll be posting pic’s of the event all weekend. Feel free to pop on over to my FB page and check it out!

Curious how I got into this?  Click here

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

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Conquer  Mountains Edmund Hilary

 

We all have mountains in our lives. It does not matter what they are, to each of us the things that WE have to overcome, can seem monumental. To someone else, your mountain may look small, they may have already made the journey, or it may not be a journey they will ever make.

Conquering these mountains, conquering our challenges…requires us to dig deep, to grow, to stretch, to be scared but willing to take that next step anyway. And before we can, we have to overcome ourselves. We have to overcome our fear, our limiting beliefs, our doubts…we have to commit to trying but first, at least some small part of us needs to BELIEVE.

Do you have mountains in your life? Are you willing to conquer yourself to climb them?  It may be a long hard climb but the view is FANTASTIC!

 

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

 

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…you never forget.

Bikes

or so the saying goes.

And when I was little I did learn to ride a bicycle. I rode all over the place. I did crazy things like go down realllllly steep hills on my bike and all kinds of tricks. Not cool BMX tricks, but in my head, they were super cool.

Sure, I wiped out a lot, but that never really bothered me.

 

Fast forward eleventy-billion years, and as a grown woman…riding a bike TERRIFIES me. ME! WTF?!  I am not typically someone who is afraid of many things. I have been know to be a little bit of an adrenaline junkie.

HOW does someone forget how to ride a bike?

When I try…I feel out of control. I feel like maybe I will DIE!! I know it’s not rational.

I might FALL! I don’t like falling.

I suspect it is that out of control feeling that I do not like. When I think it thru though, I am in control.

It may be that I dislike it because I feel awkward and I don’t feel like I’m “good” at it. I don’t like things that I’m not good at.

So, why am I trying?

Welllll, I don’t like things I’m not good at…but I think thats surface level. If I go deeper –  maybe it’s BECAUSE it makes me so damn uncomfortable, that I would really like to conquer it.  Why am I having such a hard time trusting myself, relaxing, letting go? Where else am I doing this in life…

“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance, you must keep moving.”

― Albert Einstein

 

I use to believe I was unable to run. I could never be a runner. Those words came out of my mouth more than once.

I have run 2 half marathons.

I love running.

The limiting thoughts that I had created and accepted as truth almost kept me from experiencing something different, from discovering something I love.

It took work, it took determination, it took discipline…it took me being uncomfortable and getting out of my own way. More than anything it took me changing my belief system…from I can’t to I WILL!

hopebike

Yeah, I guess life IS like learning to ride a bicycle after all.

 

 

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

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I am Mama to three teenagers.

HIKE TEENS

It’s funny, I remember when they were little and people would comment on how close they were in age (22 mths each way) and then almost immediately they would say “OH! Just wait until they are ALL three teenagers!”

And now they are.

And while I have enjoyed every stage of their lives, I must say…I might just be enjoying this one the most. Don’t get me wrong, I was MADE for having babies. There is nothing quite as satisfying as knowing you are needed in the way an infant needs you…except maybe…a young adult who doesn’t.

Don’t get me wrong, I KNOW they still need me. However, teaching them how to be independent has been more satisfying than I could have ever imagined. Recognizing my children as capable individuals has been such a gift, to them and to me.

I feel this most with my oldest. He is 17 and a 1/2 (do you still count 1/2 years at this point? You DO if you are THAT close to 18) and changing into a man before my very eyes.  He is attending college, working (closer to FT than PT) and insisting on paying for certain things. He just got back (as I am writing this) from 5 days at the beach with his bosses and coworkers. He did not ask me for ANY money.

80'sANT

 

This was his first trip away from home by himself (without school or family) and I was not worried about him. Now…he did go with responsible adults and I may have been more worried if he was with a group of friends but…I know that I have done what I can and that he is a level headed, responsible and CAPABLE person. Not *just* my son.

He is months away from going out into the world, which probably means continuing to live at home for awhile ;)  and he knows how to cook, clean, do laundry, grocery shop, iron, unclog a toilet, budget, and many other things. In addition to all those important skills…he REALLY knows how to think for himself, he cares about others and he is a good and kind person.

This shit is getting real. Letting go a little every day while becoming even closer is a tricky little balancing act but we are figuring it out. Our roles are changing and we are BOTH growing. and *I* am learning SO much.

 

 

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

 

 

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Veggie Tofu Stir-Fry

A Meatless Monday recipe! Enjoy!

Veggie Tofu Stir-Fry
  • 1 (14-ounce) package firm tofu, drained and diced into 1/2-inch cubes
  • 2 tsp. garlic, minced
  • 1 tsp. fresh ginger, minced
  • 2/3 cup vegetable broth, low-sodium
  • 1 cup snow peas
  • 2 cups asparagus, cut diagonally into 1/2-inch pieces
  • 1 cup carrots, cut diagonally into 1/2-inch pieces
  • 1 cup broccoli florets
  • 1/2 cup red onion, sliced
  • 2 Tbsp. soy sauce, low-sodium
  • 1 Tbsp. cornstarch
  • 1 tsp. brown sugar
  • Black pepper to taste

In a large skillet or wok, combine garlic, ginger, and 1/4 cup vegetable broth. Simmer for 2 minutes. Add snow peas, asparagus, carrots, broccoli, and onion; cook, stirring, over medium-high heat until vegetables become slightly soft (about 3 to 5 minutes). Add tofu and soy sauce. Next, combine remaining vegetable broth, cornstarch, and brown sugar in a small bowl. Add mixture to skillet and bring to a simmer, allowing sauce to thicken (about 5 minutes). Season with black pepper. Serve immediately. Makes 4 servings.

Preparation Time: 15 minutes

Cooking Time: 12 minutes

Nutritional Information: (per serving)

Calories: 168
Protein: 13 g
Fiber: 4 g
Carbs: 17 g
Fat Total: 6 g
Saturated Fat: 1 g

 

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Help…wanted or not!

We’ve talked before about being open to receiving help but today I’d like to chat about giving it. Sounds good right? It’s so nice to help people. It feels good to be helpful. For SOME of us…a little too good.

Help wanted

What happens if someone doesn’t really want your help? Is it helpful to give advice, solutions, etc when someone really just wanted to be heard? Maybe. Sometimes. Other times, maybe not.

This is something that I have STRUGGLED (and yes, that did warrant caps, I mean struggled HARD) with over the past few years. I use to help people as a full time hobby…but sometimes, on their end I think it felt like a contact sport more than a helpful hand. An ex beau of mine teasingly (but in trying to make a point) nicknamed me Ms. Helpy Helperton.

If you mentioned in passing you were looking for an apartment, I’d google and send you links on my lunch break (I use to work for the man). If you told me you LOVED a certain brand of something that was hard to find, I’d look HIGH and LOW for it and get it for you. I was ADDICTED to helping people. The high I got from it was better than…actually caring about IF they wanted, needed or should receive my help.

SHOULD? Yeah, thats a novel idea I did not quite grasp back then. Sometimes by helping (read DOING) for others, we are not holding THEM capable. We rob them of their own experiences, we steal their moment of pride or accomplishment in reaching a solution on their own.

What I realized is…somewhere along the way…what probably started out as good intention (I STILL truly love helping others) got twisted sometimes and ended up being about control or about MY desire rather than the person I was so hell bent on helping.

These days I try to stay aware of – IF my help is wanted, WHAT sort of help is appropriate (if any) and WHY I am helping. Just some questions I try to remember to ask myself to  keep me honest and my intentions in line with how I really want to be.

Was this article helpful? :P

Hope Fato

Hope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

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How to BE

MamaCollage
Today was one of those wonderful days where I felt completely present and full of gratitude ALL day long.

Most days I have a few moments like this, if I am lucky…and some days I am so caught up in…everything…that I don’t think I am present at all. I forget in the craziness of life how to just BE.

In hopes of being able to experience this more often, and in case it helps anyone else…I am blogging about it!

 

WHAT was so different? Well, yes…

it WAS Mothers Day and I got some presents and my daughter made me breakfast and  I bought myself some flowers and we went on a hike and out to dinner

BUT!!!

it wasn’t any of these things really…though it is nice feeling spoiled.

My day was so wonderful because I connected with my children and enjoyed them. I didn’t focus on problems, didn’t stay glued to my phone, didn’t worry about tomorrow or next week or last year. I got some chores done this morning, crossed some things off my list, felt like I accomplished something and then RELAXED into my day. I talked with and listened to my children instead of talking AT them. I was simply WITH them. No real agenda, no deadlines, no goal.

I know we cannot operate with no agenda or schedule EVERY day but how can we feel like this on a more regular basis?  I’m going to try and simply it (if I can), so that I might be able to look back at it and do it again.

GRATITUDE – WORRY  + PEOPLE I LOVE –  TOO MUCH TIME ON PHONE/COMPUTER + FACE to FACE COMMUNICATION = BEING PRESENT & FEELING BLESSED

This EXACT formula may not work for you (or for me every time) but play around with it and see what works!

I hope that you experienced this on your special day and that it’s something you experience for at least a few moments EVERY day!! I know its something that I want more of in my life.

 

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

Posted in Balance, Health, Kids, Love, Moms, Parenting, Peace, Spirituality, Tips | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 10 Comments

Happy Mothers Day to ALL Mama’s …

tulips
…today and every day because EVERY day that someone calls you Mom, you are BLESSED!

MamaandDaughter

with my daughter, Amelia
 
 
 
Mom&boys
with my boys, Dominic (r) and Antonio (l)

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

 

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Bible Study
A few weeks ago a friend invited me to bible study. She was quick to say “really its book club at a church and we have never opened a bible, its more like a personal development book club. I don’t even attend the church where its held”

“You don’t discuss the bible or god or religion?” I asked, double checking. It’s not that I am like really super opposed to any of those things, its just that I am not interested in them either, not in the traditional sense…or not in what *I* have decided is the traditional sense. Honestly, they use to make me want to run in the opposite direction but I was feeling open and curious.

Of course the first time I went, the only people in attendance are the friend who invited me and the Pastor of the church (who runs the group). Rather than talk about the book we end up talking almost the whole time about God, and Jesus, and the Bible…about religion and ordained women (did I mention the pastor is a really COOOL chick?) and ministry.  We talked about different religions and religious history and problems with organized religion.

It was one of the most open and real conversations I have ever had about my beliefs and definitely the most comfortable I have ever felt in asking questions without fear. I sat on a couch in a church and said out loud to a minister that I do not feel comfortable with God.

Religion for me has always been something that I either wished I felt a part of or something I wanted no part of. Its been hard to find some kind of middle ground and many times I have either felt judged or assume I will be. Yet, I pray…

I expressed that if I substitute the Universe in for the word/name/idea of God, I’m all good. It magically transforms it for me. She shared with me that perhaps it was because I was seeing God in the image/definition/form of man and that did not seem big enough for me…I needed something as expansive as The Universe. WOW. I am pretty sure thats a big part of it.

Honestly, I am pretty sure it also has something to do with the fact that we (WE? you? people?) refer to God as The Father. This really makes it even more difficult for me. I do not have a healthy relationship with my father, and a girl with daddy issues just has a hard time with that whole unconditional fatherly love concept…alas, I believe thats a blog post for another day.

 

Hope FatoHope Fato is a Lifestyle Coach focusing on Health & Wellness. This Mom of 3 strives to help others receive the support they need in making positive changes in their health and in their life. Whether you are struggling physically, financially, or emotionally she is here to help you bring out your BEST inner self and help you achieve real results.

 

P.S. – If you found this post helpful, please share it with others so they can benefit, too!

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